who we really are

Julie Olson, graphic designer, entrepreneur, and artist, is perhaps most know for her love and acceptance. She has the ability to make everyone she comes into contact with feel like they have been touched by the sun. If you have met her, you most likely agree that she will heal the world. On March 15, 2008 Julie interviewed Matthew and Laura on Instant Messenger.

Julie: Matthew, where are you now?
Matthew: In my room, in San Diego.

Julie: and Laura?
Laura: In the front room at my parents house.

Julie: So Matthew, when you think of Laura, sitting in the front room of her parents house, what comes to mind?
Matthew: Well, truly Julie, I think of her parents bible and sleeping on the couch in a sleeping bag, but also her curled up in a blanket on Molly's couch.

Julie: And, Laura, what comes to mind when you think of Matthew?
Laura: I am curled up with a blanket! I think of him holding his hand over his mouth and tapping with his feet sometimes and the baby cat and feeling lonely and empty cups
Matthew: I am tapping right now
Laura: real talk!

Julie: Would you guys like to take a stroll down memory lane? We're going to go down a street I've never been down before... only you two have been. So you'll have to show the way...
Laura: This feels like a guided meditation.
Matthew: It's perfect.

Julie: So, we're walking... and I hear this announcer say... "and this, is the place where they first met..." Can you tell me about this place? Anything that comes to mind.
Laura: Hmm, where did we first meet?
Matthew: I was trying to figure it out. It must have been Horizon, but when and where is unknown I think.

Julie: Memory lane is a place where you see physical landmarks, but also impressions, vague images, feelings, words, etc.
Laura: I remember people telling me to go out with you at wilderness in 7th grade and then walking outside and feeling weird and powerful walking to dinner. Seeing you with Cameron and Lucas and Trevor. I remember when you asked me out at the miles ahead crusade. I was ready for it.

Julie: Were you thinking it might happen?
Laura: I told Chelsea that day that if you asked I would say yes.
Matthew: I think I knew that before hand.
Laura: I feel like it was the first time we spoke. Is that true?
Matthew: It probably was.
Laura: Because Lucas called me for you once before we went out I think, or maybe it was during, and he was over at your house.
Matthew: I don't think I could actually talk to you, you were very beautiful with your dark clothes and burgundy hair.
Laura: hahaha

Julie: (Was Matthew the wilderness character?)
Laura: Wilderness was the name of the week we would go to camp with our class in school. And yes, he was.
Matthew: I remember walking around wildnerness wanting to hang out where you were.
Laura: My friend Jennelle said he was a "lamb," a sweet lamb.
Matthew: I talked to Casey about you a lot. She said you were kind and to go for it.

Julie: So when he asked you out, was it to "go out" aka, to get together, or just to go out somewhere?
Laura: To be together. We never really hung out outside of school. We mostly just talked on the phone and sat together at lunch and after school.
Matthew: And never really talked. I always got butterflies in my stomach when we would hug.

Julie: Looking back now, do you think there were any inklings of thoughts that might have led you to predict you'd be having this conversation right now? (on the eves of your wedding)
Laura: Never!
Matthew: Quite unlikely.

Julie: So give me a little timeline, when did this initial "going out" start?
Laura: We went out in april of 1998 when aaron was born. I called Matthew on that day.

Julie: Was that a scary call?
Matthew: Not particularly. A scary call did happen though. Well, actually I don't remember if it was on the phone or in person.
Laura: Did I break up with you on the phone? We broke up twice.
Matthew: I remember crying on the phone and feeling dumb.
Laura: I felt so bad.
Matthew: I knew were going to though because your mom told my mom at church.

Julie: what were the breakups about?
Laura: Just because.

Matthew: Because it was 7th grade. We have no real documentation of that relationship, no pictures or anything.

Julie: So what happened after that?
Laura: We weren't friends really until 11th grade.
Matthew: We didn't talk until 11th grade.

Julie: And in the 11th grade, what sparked your interest in each other again?
Matthew: Well, for me, I had had a bad breakup kind of thing and so I was looking for new friends and I started to hang out with Laura and Linnea.
Laura: Me too. We just had a lot of fun all of the time, the three of us.

Julie: When did things become romantic again between the two of you?
Matthew: The summer before our senior year.
Laura: We became best friends and then I just had this huge crush on him.
Matthew: (The feeling was mutual.)
Laura: We started sneaking around behind our friends back and hanging out and talking. He always took me home last.
Julie: Oh man, so exciting!
Laura: And when she was in Italy we stayed out really late and talked forever. And then one night before I was going to go to visit schools in the bay area, he came over to my house after work and we looked at photos of me as a baby for some reason. When we said goodbye I kissed him on the cheek and ran inside. I don't know what came over me.
Matthew: It was the most magical experience. I felt like a million bucks. It was so overwhelming and surprising in the best possible way. Because until then we would pseudo-snuggle, but "as friends." We would sit in my car in her parents driveway and talk for hours. The point being, that the kiss was very shocking and refreshing.

Julie: So, after this first snuck cheek kiss, how did things progress?
Matthew: Well, after a trip to New York in August of 2002, we were together.

Julie: What was it about each other that you cherished enough to see your relationship through so much drama?
Laura: I had never felt the connection I felt with Matthew in anyone else before. It transcended time and space and words. It just was. It was the best feeling to be with each other. So free, for no good reason. So it didn't feel like losing or giving up anything for me. It felt like the only right thing I had ever done.
Julie: What a perfect feeling.
Laura: I still feel like that. It's so weird. We have changed so many times.
Matthew: We have evolved together to be sure. Thinking about all those times past, just now, We are not the same people at all, but our connection remains the same.
Laura: Even when we questioned it, it just stood there with its moon face all silent and important.

Julie: Do you have any thoughts on the origin of this connection? Is it coincidence? Pre-planned? How do you think of it, casually, to yourselves? Was it ordained by powers outside of yourselves?
Laura: I don't really think about that at all, now that you mention it.
Matthew: Divine intervention. Maybe. It must be that we are soul mates. Is there a less cliché way to say that? But we definitely complement each other in a way that feels perfect.
Julie: When taken at non-cliché face value, soul mates sounds like an accurate description to me.
Laura: Me too. Or magnets.
Matthew: It's the COSMOS.
Laura: Magic. Gravity.
Matthew: Celestial bodies attracted by energy.
Julie: I love these descriptions!

Julie: Are you two aware that marriage is thought of to be a tricky endeavor?
Laura: I do not think about it often. What are you meaning more specifically?
Matthew: Weddings are tricky endeavors.
Laura: WORD
Julie: haha

Julie: Well, to rephrase, why do you think marriages fall apart? and, on the flipside, what makes them stay together?
Laura: I think marriages fall apart because people feel lonely.
Julie: I think that's true.
Laura: I am comfortable with loneliness. I just want to do my best. That's all I can do.
Julie: I feel like that's such a truly good way of thinking about it.

Julie: do you think of yourselves as getting Married? Do you think of the institution of Marriage, or do you just think of each other?
Laura: I just think of Matthew. I think of it as sharing our love with people. Of finally letting them in.
Matthew: A way of letting people in that only works in this way.
Laura: And having a ceremony for them to let us grow up and move on.
Matthew: It is as much for us as it is for everyone.
Laura: It's a dove release. A rite of passage.

Julie: Are there any little things that you think of when you imagine the next season of your lives, after the ceremony?
Laura: SO MANY.
Matthew: Things like bookshelves.
Laura: Not having to walk home.

Julie: Will you mix your book collections onto the same shelves?
Laura: That's a big question.
Matthew: Either way, just the thought of it excites me to no end.
Laura: I always think of Ex Libris. I just want to wake up together forever and have mornings.

Julie: Do you see children in your future?
Matthew: Maybe. We have been more thinking of how for that not to happen now.
Laura: hahaha
Julie: Oh yeah, I forgot that people have to think about that! hahaha
Laura: I am open to both ideas. I don't want to have children until I am at least 30. Matthew would be the best father, that is the only reason I would do it.
Julie: I agree Laura!

Julie: Does it make you uncomfortable to think of everyone you know thinking about you two on your wedding night?
Matthew: I would like for them too.
Julie: People can't help but think of that, you know?

Julie: Do you know where you'll be moving into when you return from your honeymoon? And will it be ready, furnished, and waiting?
Laura: We are looking at places right now. Hopefully, that is the goal.

Julie: Seriously, what an exciting thought! To have your new home waiting! I have to say, I am so so happy for the two of you.
Laura: Thank you Julie, that really means a lot.
Julie: And I know that anyone reading this in the future is feeling the same way. You two create love everywhere you go, and it echoes into us.
Laura: You pulse it right back.

Julie: Are you writing your own vows?
Matthew: We haven't breached that subject yet. I'm thinking yes.
Laura: I feel so nervous to do that.
Julie: Just think of Matthew and it will come to you I'm sure.
Matthew: Well we could adlib. Like, Laura is really cute and I love her.
Laura: I would want everyone to take a moment of silence and believe and that be it.
Julie: I think you meant MadLib, Matthew!
Laura: MadLib! And take suggestions.
Matthew: Yes, we should MadLib. "Ok, we need an adjective."

Julie: Okay, how about as a closing exercise? I'll MadLib you guys really quick. I need:
1. an adjective
2. a number
3. an object
4. a food
5. any word or phrase
Laura:
1. small
2. two
Matthew:
3. pen
4. pancakes
What should 5 be?
Laura: privates.
Matthew: YES!
Julie: Laura and Matthew are getting married on a small day. They will be most happy if two people attend, and if they all bring pens. Once they get married, they will eat pancakes every night and love each other forever and always look up at the stars and think "Wow, privates."
Matthew: HAAHAHAHAHAHAH. Wow, privates.
Julie: The End!